top of page

The book, Motherhood - Is It For Me?, is a lovingly created version of our very successful program of the same name. It is both revolutionary and profound.


Through a time-oriented and engaging process you'll find everything you need to guide you to answering this question for yourself.

Check out what other readers are saying at:


Here's what other authors have said:

“Most women struggling to decide whether or not to have a child make this choice alone, rarely sharing their doubts and fears with anybody because of the shame and anxiety involved in even considering motherhood an option rather than an imperative. Now, they will find the wise, thoughtful and non-judgmental advice they need in Motherhood – Is It For Me?, the systematic program designed to guide any woman to the life choice that is right for her.” 

Jeanne Safer, PhD

Author of Beyond Motherhood:  Choosing a Life without Children

“Welcome to a contemporary guide for the contemporary woman! No longer is it to be assumed that there is a ‘maternal instinct’ in a framework of moral judgment. In this book conflict and ambivalence are accepted as a normalized rite of passage to self-acceptance. From a neutral and nurturing point of view regarding the choice, the authors provide a graceful, twelve-week encounter a woman can make with herself. The writing is accessible and the techniques relevant, all with the goal to help a woman gradually uncover hidden, unconscious parts of herself – echoes from the past – that when integrated into her sense of herself can move her forward regarding a choice about motherhood. This book provides a well recommended journey for the questioning woman.” 

Phyllis Tobin, PhD

Author of Motherhood Optional: A Psychological Journey

“Motherhood – Is It For Me? is the first of its kind! It offers an inward focused, self-directed process designed to put aside outside influences, tend to places inside that may be in the way of inner knowing, and reveal your true desires about whether you want to become a parent. Denise L. Carlini and Ann Davidman’s valuable tool will skillfully help you uncover the roots of your ambivalence and guide you on your unique path to clarity.” 

Laura Carroll

“Motherhood – Is It For Me? is a book that will help so many women to find their way to peace around whether to have children or not. It is much needed as it addresses one of the core social taboos that make having a frank dialogue about this so difficult – ambivalence. Many involuntarily childless women who seek the support of Gateway Women often come to the painful realization that one of the reasons they didn’t pursue motherhood more actively was because of unexplored ambivalence, often stemming from childhood experiences that left them confused about what motherhood ‘meant.’ I believe that ambivalence is quite normal, yet the prevailing view of society’s pronatalism is that women ‘just know’; a belief that fails to recognize that modern women’s lives and opportunities, including access to birth control, have created choices that make ‘just knowing’ a thing of the past, if ever it truly existed. As a society, we’re only just beginning to create a space and a language for how to navigate these choices, and this thorough, intelligent, empathic, non-judgmental book takes us a big step forward. Whether you wish to explore and be sure of your reasons for choosing to live childfree, or to understand what’s blocking you from actively pursuing the path to motherhood, this book will be your friend and guide. I know many women who will wish it had been around twenty years ago, and I am grateful to Denise and Ann for making it available to the generations of daughters that come after us.” 

Jody Day

“As parenthood moves from an assumption to a decision, it’s important to give yourself some reflective time, away from all the external chatter, to examine your motives, stories, and history and decide for yourself whether being a birth parent or adoptive parent is an appropriate role for you. Motherhood – Is It For Me? is your invitation to be an independent decision maker and the creator of your rich experience of life as you make the choice to be a parent or to remain contentedly childfree.” 

Laura S. Scott

Author of Two Is Enough:  A Couple’s Guide to Living Childless by Choice, and director of the Childless by Choice Project

Please reload

bottom of page